xmas

I spent most of my Christmas working on reinstalling the operating system on my computer. In doing so I found that my network attached hard drive, which I had not tried accessing for a good while, had died. Gone are the many gigs of videos I had sitting there for easy access, as well as a convenient place to back up my music. Fifteen gigs of music which I forgot to back up while sifting through the files that I wanted to make sure I did not lose.

Meanwhile my family gatherings for the holidays has shrunk down to just my family and my sister's husband instead of the traditional hooplah of years past at my grandma's house. I did not exactly miss the insanity of a cold house containing people I mostly could not understand, however this new format isn't especially appealing. All because of some good old fashion family bickering.

And as I stare at the clock slowly counting up the seconds, minutes and hours, I can only think of the last conversation I had with a friend of mine that went sour just a little while ago. With instant messages being less instant than speaking with someone directly, you have more time to pick and choose your words carefully. I thought I did, but it seems like the only thing I accomplished was to get someone to start thinking twice about mentioning anything to me again. I'm hoping I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill because of all the other things weighing on my mind (which are actually unrelated to anything I've mentioned thus far).

As I look over what I've just written, I have to wonder why I'm choosing to push this onto a public place where friends and strangers see it. It may elicit a response from people I know, and the last thing I want to do is explain anything despite the fact that I wrote so many things that can be expanded upon.

So its 4AM the day after Christmas. My computer is running nice and error free again, and the glut of holiday music will finally be coming to an end. I'll take that as a victory.